This is for you.

This is for you.

This is for the times you said you missed me but never came to see me.

And I came to see you.

This is for time I said I love you.

And you smiled and nodded.

This is for the times I was sober driver to get you home safely.

While you got drunk and took advantage.

This is for the money I spent on taking you out.

And when I had no money you were busy.

This is for the drunken nights we spent.

When I had to sober up to take care of you falling in the gutter.

This is for the nights you cried.

And I held you and told you life was beautiful.

This is for the music that reminds me of you

that I can't listen to anymore.

This is for the day I got called out of class

because you tried to kill yourself and I had to go the hospital with you.

This is for the times I stayed strong for you.

Then cried myself to sleep as I worried about you.

This is for the times I stood by you when everyone else walked away.

And the times you walked away from me when I needed you.

This is for the times we watched movies and ate pizza when you needed a girls night in.

And the times you were busy with your boy when I needed your company.

This is for the times your boyfriend let you down.

But when everything was ok, I never heard from you.

This is for your social crimes against me.

And the mistakes you are still to make to those you "love".

This is for your "true friends"

Who are yet to be let down by you like I was.

This is for when you said I did nothing for you

When all of it has been conveniently forgotten.

This is for my mirror's reflection

Which is no longer broken by your presence in my life.

I'm finding me again.

This is for the life I couldn't imagine without you that I'm now discovering.

While you call me selfish because I'm no longer your servant.

So take your anger and shove it,

Because I'm past your selfish ways.

This is for my tolerance.

This is for my generosity.

This is for my caring.

This is for my love.

This is for my sadness.

This is for my anxiety.

This is for my panic.

This is for my tears.

Now,

This blog is for me.

This is the one outlet you can't ruin for me.

~

"If you lost everything in a moment, would you notice?
Could you rebuild something so hopeless?
Are you hopeless?
And when you wake alone, with no one left to hold,
You wont need to know all the things I know."

Thrones - Alexisonfire